Conversation topics for a date—the best questions to get to know someone
The premise for impressive conversation topics lies in successful communication—not only when getting to know someone, but in many situations in life. However, the question of suitable conversation topics arises particularly during the getting-to-know-you phase. What questions are interesting when getting to know someone? What would your date like to talk about? Which topics should you avoid? If you are looking for answers to these questions, you should now be excited.
6 topics of conversation for the first date
Are you about to go on your first date and feeling nervous? You've probably already gone through various scenarios in your head about how the first meeting might go. Of course, you're wondering which topics of conversation will go down well and which won't. Many people find small talk difficult. You only know your date very briefly and are therefore unsure about possible topics of conversation. You can't go wrong with these six topics:
1. Relaxed small talk to get started
Find a relaxed way to start with small talk. It couldn't be more authentic, and you can think about which topic of conversation you want to steer the conversation towards next. Remember, you want to get to know your date. Listen actively and show genuine interest.
Top 5 questions to get to know each other and start the date off on a relaxed note
Did you find your way here easily?
How has your day been so far?
What have you been up to today?
It's great to see you, how are you?
What would you like to do?
2. Leisure time
Once you've found an easy way to start the conversation, questions about your leisure activities are always a good way to get to know each other better. Perhaps the small talk has given you a hint about some of the activities your date enjoys in their free time. If not, you can charmingly steer the conversation in that direction.
What do you like to do in your free time?
How do you like to spend your weekends?
If you want to be more specific, you can also ask more targeted questions.
What kind of books do you like to read?
What sports are you interested in and which ones do you actively participate in?
Do you like going to the movies?
3. Talk about travel
Another interesting topic of conversation for your first meeting is travel. We all need time off, whether it's an hour's drive to the Baltic Sea or a 12-hour flight to Los Angeles. We all have different ideas and preferences when it comes to travel. This is an ideal way to find out what your date is passionate about and what is out of the question.
Which countries have you been to?
Where did you like it best so far?
And what is your next destination?
What kind of travel do you like? (Backpacking, relaxing vacations, active vacations, city trips, etc.)
What would you like to try someday?
4. Career
What do you do for a living? This question will definitely come up if you haven't already touched on the subject while writing. In any case, talking about your job is always welcome because it provides a sense of security. After all, it's something you deal with every day. Incidentally, interest in your job is also one of the most important qualities that women and men look for in a relationship.
What do you do for a living?
What are your daily tasks?
Are you satisfied with your job?
What do you like most about your work?
Would you like to change anything?
5. Goals and dreams
Don't we all have dreams that we strive for? This is a great moment to let your thoughts wander and talk about wishes, dreams, and goals. Don't be too rigid, just ask freely.
What is your biggest dream?
What are your goals for the next 3 years?
Is there anything you definitely want to achieve?
6. A creative topic of conversation: role models
Whether parents, celebrities, or politicians. Each of us has a role model with whom we share certain views and characteristics 100% and try almost meticulously to achieve the same. This is a nice topic of conversation for your first date, not only to find out about each other's role models, but also to learn about your counterpart's views. Role models are also an ideal starting point for deep conversations.
Who is your biggest role model?
Why is he or she your biggest role model?
Are there any other role models who inspire you?
What topics of conversation do women particularly like?
Everything to do with fashion and styling
Entertainment—current movies and TV series
Philosophizing about life
Hobbies and leisure
Serious topics that require your personal opinion
Food and drink
Friendships, relationships with family
What questions are good for getting to know men?
Sports are a hot topic for most men
Embarrassing, courageous, bizarre, funny, or life-changing experiences
Hobbies and leisure activities
Cars and technology
Funny stories from the past, e.g., school, college, training
Friendships, relationships with family
What can you do when you run out of topics to talk about?
The whole question-and-answer game can become a bit exhausting during a meeting. The thought of always having to have a question ready, combined with nervousness and uncertainty, can quickly become too much. But try to stay relaxed, because if you run out of topics to talk about, it's absolutely not a big deal.
A little silence and a break to catch your breath will help you calm down a bit. It also gives you the opportunity to take a short break and process the whole conversation. And it's also nice to not talk in between, but perhaps walk hand in hand through the park and enjoy the moment itself.
If you still feel the urge to ask more questions to get to know each other better, just follow up on things you may not have understood very well or that you find particularly interesting about your conversation partner.
“I know we've already talked about this, but could you explain to me again in more detail what you do at work all day?”
5 topics you should avoid
As much as you may want to ask questions, there are still some topics that don't necessarily speak well for you if you bring them up. Here is a brief summary of the most important questions you should avoid asking when getting to know someone:
Your ex-partner is definitely off limits.
You should also avoid anything related to sex for the time being.
Money is a very sensitive topic, so you should definitely not bring it up.
Family problems are not topics of conversation for a first date.
Embarrassing stories that don't necessarily show you in a positive light.
Checklist: Dos and don'ts for conversation topics on your date
Dos:
Small talk to get the conversation flowing with general topics.
Deeper conversations on topics where you notice your date is blossoming.
Consider and allude to topics that are interesting for both men and women.
Don'ts:
Stay away from taboo topics: leave exes in the past and avoid current problems and embarrassing situations.
Think about balance—there should be an equal ratio of questions and answers between you.
