Who pays on the first date? Survey reveals surprising answer

Who pays the bill on a first date? And should a man hold the door open for a woman? Are such conservative dating rituals still relevant today? LemonSwan asked men and women exactly that in a representative study.

Here are the exciting results:

Conservative rituals for getting to know each other are more important to older people than younger people

The man should pay the bill on the first date and hold the door open for the woman. Almost half (44 percent) of all men and women surveyed do not consider this a must, but they do perceive it as positive when the man takes on the role of gentleman when meeting for the first time. However, there is a clear generational difference here. While only 26 percent of respondents between the ages of 18 and 24 say that conservative rituals for getting to know each other on a first date strike them as positive, exactly half (50 percent) of men and women over the age of 55 feel this way.

“I think it's outdated and unnecessary!” says more than one in four between the ages of 18 and 24 (17 percent), but only one in five (20 percent) in the 55 and older generation.

Who pays the bill on a first date? Single women vs. single men

When it comes to the question “Who pays the bill on a first date?”, there are clear differences between single men and single women. While 51 percent of female respondents aged 18 and over say that they view conservative dating rituals positively, the figure is significantly lower among men at 37 percent.

On the other hand, around one in five women (19 percent) and more than one in four men (28 percent) consider such rituals to be outdated and unimportant. A further 12 percent of men and 11 percent of women without a partner say that such gentlemanly behavior is completely unimportant to them on a first date.

Equality yes, but not when getting to know someone?

The results show that the majority of respondents still consider traditional gender roles to be positive, at least on a first date. However, when it comes to relationships, the picture is quite different.

One in three (33 percent) want a partnership based on equality. Another 30 percent want an equal relationship. A short-term affair, on the other hand, is out of the question for the vast majority. Only 2 percent of respondents said they were looking for one. Thirty-nine percent are looking for a long-term partnership. One in four singles (25 percent) value a partner who gives them freedom. Almost as many (24 percent) are primarily looking for affection in their next relationship.

This conflict between conservative dating rituals and the desire for equality, i.e., a relationship on equal terms, clearly illustrates where we currently stand in terms of social change.

We are still influenced by old patterns and rituals, but at the same time, there is also a shift in roles.

Who pays on the first date? The answer to the question of all questions

No matter how well your first date went, the moment the bill arrives is almost always somewhat awkward. And there are so many things you can do wrong. Some women feel offended if the man doesn't invite them. Others feel offended if he simply pays the bill without asking them first. However, if you split the bill, it often leaves you with the feeling that the evening didn't go so well after all.

But the answer is actually not that complicated: the person who invited the other person pays.

Whether you follow etiquette advice or have your own answer to the question “Who pays on a first date?” is ultimately up to you, of course.

And for those who would rather avoid this question altogether, we recommend simply inviting them to a homemade picnic for the first meeting. ;)