Table of contents

What men want: What men desire from a woman

What do men want? After a few years of life experience—and one or two relationships—most women know what they want from a partnership. But what about men? Do men only pay attention to a woman's appearance? What do men find attractive in women? And is it even possible to make general statements about what men want? We believe: partly. Of course, every man is unique. But there are more similarities than you might have thought. Knowing what men like will not only make online dating easier for you. So what is it that men really want?

Table of contents

What do men find attractive in women? The 3 most important qualities

Are you wondering what men like in women? And what do they find particularly attractive in us women? You're certainly not the first to ask this question. Of course, there is no blanket answer that applies to all men on earth. Nevertheless, there are a few qualities that almost all men find appealing. Here are the three most important ones:

1. Men like natural women

Do men prefer women with curves? Do men find blondes or brunettes more attractive? When it comes to hair color, height, or clothing style, men's preferences vary. However, when asked about their dream woman, almost all of them mention one keyword: naturalness. But what does that actually mean? Wearing as little makeup as possible and foregoing any styling?

It's clear that foundation shouldn't be visible from five meters away. But the truth is that what the average man perceives as “natural” has cost the average woman at least 30 minutes in the bathroom. Actually, the exact amount of makeup isn't the point. What looks natural and confident depends mainly on the woman wearing it. An enthusiastic partygoer in a costume can look just as unnatural as a jogger wearing bright lipstick. If you remain true to yourself, you will appear natural all on your own. This will help you score points with men who are truly right for you.

2. Independence

We women like to give our new partners our undivided attention. This carries the risk of neglecting our friends and hobbies. However, this sends the message to the man that he is becoming the center of our lives. It sounds romantic, but that's exactly what scares many men. So continue to meet up with your friends regularly and pursue your hobbies. Men like women who are independent and self-sufficient.

3. Men find women with a sense of humor attractive

The most common answer to the question of what men find attractive is definitely a sense of humor. We can understand that, because being able to laugh together is simply indispensable. And a partner who is always serious can even be really exhausting. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to agree with every comedian and constantly be rolling on the floor laughing. But try to relax with him and find out if you're on the same wavelength in this area.

5 traits that men dislike in women

In addition to the traits that men particularly like in women, it's also good to know what men find totally unattractive, right? Most men find these five things anything but attractive:

1. Talking badly about your ex

Men don't want women who constantly badmouth their ex. It makes them feel like you're not over him yet.

2. Playing hard to get

Many men like to be able to win a woman over. But if they feel like she's making it extra difficult for them and playing games, most men find that quite unattractive.

3. Men find women who don't have their own opinions unattractive

“Yes, honey, I think so too!” “I like everything you like, my darling!” Sentences like these do not go down well with men. Men find women who don't have their own opinions unattractive. Incidentally, the same applies the other way around.

4. Too much makeup is unattractive

To please men, women like to put on an extra layer of makeup. However, psychological studies now show that the opposite is true. Many men find too much makeup off-putting rather than attractive. As mentioned at the beginning, men like women who are natural.

5. Men don't like comparisons with previous partners

Men also don't like being compared to their ex-partners by women. It's better to save these topics of conversation for your next girls' night out.

How do men want to be approached?

What do men really want? To be approached by women. Men are happy when they don't always have to be the ones to make the first move. For women, however, this is a greater challenge. Many women have become accustomed to men always making the first move.

Nowadays, however, women should also be able to make the first move. Not only does this show self-confidence, but it will also take him by surprise. Unfortunately, it's not that often that men are approached. But what's the best way to go about it?

Approaching men in 5 steps:

Stay charming and confident.
Make eye contact with him.
Smile at the man—does he smile back? Perfect.
Make casual small talk.
Have you struck up a conversation with the man? Invite him to a café as a thank you.

The man will be happy that you approached him.

And who knows: maybe this is even the first step toward something big.

What do men want from a woman? The top 10

1. Men want to be allowed to be themselves

Unconditional love is one of the most beautiful aspects of a fulfilling relationship. In the early stages, we are very good at expressing this love and simply overlooking each other's faults. As the relationship progresses, our partner's quirks become more apparent. Many women then tend to want to change them. In the long run, this is poison for a relationship. Men usually know themselves that there are areas they need to work on. Men want women who don't want to fundamentally change their characteristics and character.

2. Men love simplicity

There's one thing you hear from men time and time again: they just don't understand us women. And you can't really blame them for that, because we often don't understand ourselves. That's not a bad thing in itself. – They're allowed to get emotional or a little confused sometimes. But: don't make it more complicated than it needs to be. Men love it when women know what they want. So if you know where you want to eat, say so. If something doesn't suit you, say so clearly and explicitly. Men don't like “Hmm, I don't know, you decide” at all.

3. Interest in his hobbies

This doesn't mean you have to become an IT or Bundesliga expert. Men still like it when you take his interests seriously. So when he tells you something, ask questions and try to learn more about it. You probably have hobbies that your date or partner won't find interesting. That makes it all the more wonderful when he shows an open mind anyway. Showing genuine interest is a quality that men greatly appreciate in us women.

4. Freedom is important to most men

Most men need a fair amount of freedom, both in life and in relationships. So allow him his hours in the hobby room or with friends at the pub. Give him the independence he needs and enjoy yours. If you develop a healthy mix of closeness and freedom together, it will benefit you too – just like your relationship.

5. A good relationship with his friends

A man's friends are sacred to him. That's why men like women who get along well with their circle of friends. So, especially at the beginning of the relationship, approach them openly and try to get to know them better. If your partner gets along well with your friends, getting together will be much more enjoyable for everyone.

6. Men like it when you let them be the hero

Even in kindergarten, they love knights, pirates, and adventurers more than anything else. Most men long to be heroes, to fight, to win, and to win the princess for themselves. In their relationships, too, they want to feel strong, valued, and needed. This is more about the little things in everyday life. Show that you appreciate it when he woos you, and thank him with a smile when he wants to help you.

7. What do men want from a woman? Respect

Men want women who respect them. Being respected by those around them is very important to most men. There is hardly anything worse than when you ridicule him in front of strangers or friends.

Therefore: Take him seriously. Especially when others are around. Don't tease him in front of his friends about his supposedly unmanly quirks. It's also better to keep intimate details to yourself. No matter how much you like to call each other “bear” or “bunny,” cute nicknames can wait until you're alone.

8. Friendship

After a few months, a relationship is usually no longer just about sex and exciting dates. Sooner or later, everyday life sets in. Only if your relationship is built on a strong friendship will it withstand everyday life.

So don't just be his partner, but also consciously be a good friend. Someone he can laugh with, watch movies with, build cabinets with, and steal horses with. These qualities are what will ultimately make you irreplaceable.

9. Get something back

Sure, it's great to be courted. Your date holds the door open for you, he calls you, maybe he even pays for dinner here and there. But if he's the only one taking the initiative, he'll quickly get the feeling that you're not really interested in him.

Make it clear that you care about him. Men want to be courted too. Call him first every now and then and think of something for the next meeting. This will give him the confidence he needs to continue pursuing you. By the way: you can also take the initiative when it comes to who pays on a date.

10. Men love women with future potential

Many men are looking for more than just a quick fling. They want to find a future wife or at least a long-term partner. That's why it's important to make sure you have what it takes for such a relationship.

The catch? Every man values different qualities. For some men, character is the most important thing. Other men place more value on aspects such as wanting children, marriage, or smoking habits. It is therefore important to be as honest as possible from the outset about how you envision your future and a partnership. This is the only way for both of you to find out whether you are really compatible.

How do men want to be won over?

Now that we know what men love in women and what they want in a relationship, the question remains: how do men want to be won over? Here are the most important facts: